Thursday, 25 April 2013

A Busted Suitcase

After a glorious stint in Lombok, my friend and I flew back to Bali. 

Settled into our cute new hotel.

Seriously cute - only 8 rooms in the whole place. 

Throw all my loose things on the bed. 

Put down the suitcase so I can hunt for shower items.

It is HOT!

I always lock my suitcase with a small padlock. 

For security reasons. 



Me: I can't find the key!

Friend: What?

Key in pocket for safety.
Airport security scanner. 
Put key in little box.
Put lots of other things in little box.
Through scanner.
Remove items. 
Tiny key? No memory. 
**end flashback**


I've locked myself out of the bag. 


Friend: Slice it open?

Me: Yea….I was gonna buy a new one anyway…

The bag basically disintegrated in the Gili Islands. 

The handle fell off so when you roll it you have to bend like a hunchback.

But it's still useful.

Me: Hmm…maybe I'll try downstairs first...

I take the bag down to the lobby, quietly confident that the very friendly guys working at the hotel will have some useful skills.

Me: Hai...I have a problem.

Hotel Guy: Ya, what problem?

I put my bag on the chair and show him the lock.

Me: Kunci hilang. 

Hotel Guy: Kunci hilang?!

Me: Ya. 

Hotel Guy: The key is where?

Me: I don't know?? [d'uh - hilang, la...] At the airport, maybe?

Hotel Guy: O.O

He confers with his hotel friend - they say I can go to a shop tomorrow and open it - but then remember that it's a religious holiday and everything will be closed.

Hotel Guy: Wait. Maybe we try…

They disappear into a back room.

Come back with a screw-driver. 

After some lively discussion, a few attempts to get the angle right and a couple of whacks,


The lock snaps open. 

[well you were a waste of money. if it's THAT easy to open you]

Me: YAY! Thank you :) :)

Hotel Guy: Ok :)

I take the bag back upstairs and get out my things. 

But all that carrying has made me lazy. 

I swipe everything off the bed so I can lie down. 


Me: Chap…look what I found…

[hello there]

Saturday, 20 April 2013

Being British in Indo

Just went to Bali & met up with my friend from UK.

We travelled all over and there are many stories coming your way. 

But first, Ubud. 

In Ubud the number one you-must-do is to watch a traditional Balinese dance. 

So we went. 

Despite its name, "the Palace" is a just little, open air stage.

And when I say stage I mean 10cm tall platform, surrounded by 1m of carpet, then 5 or 6 rows of plastic chairs along 3 sides.

We arrive about 30 minutes early, to get a good seat. 

We're not the first. 

So we sit and wait. 

The place fills  up. 

Not long till it starts.

When suddenly...

Two inexplicably bold audience members squeeze their way past the chairs and sit on the floor in the middle of the carpet, in front of the stage. 


Me: What is this.

Friend: They're not gonna stay there?

Me: Isn't that part of the stage?

Friend: I hope no one else thinks that's ok…

But they do. 

And couple by couple, there slowly grows a whole row of sitting people.

Friend: OMG. Someone tell them to move… 


And someone does. 

The old auntie selling bottles of water and bintang. 

Except…she doesn't shoo them away. 

She forces them to shuffle forward!!

So their feet are actually touching the "stage".

Friend: :O

Me: :O

Friend: What's the point of coming early if people can just do that??

We notice to the side, there's an older gentleman standing up. 

He has his arms folded and is staring aggressively at the line of keen beans.

Friend: [whispering] Go on, say something. 

But he doesn't.

Me: You should say something. Go on, they're ruining everyone's pictures. 


Ever the encourager ;)

Friend: Reporting to an official is more my style… 

Just then, another man goes down to join them, bringing with him a massive DSLR with an even more massive flash attached to it. 

Friend: Right. 

She shuffles importantly off into the night. 

And comes back looking disappointed. 

She describes the scenario:

Friend: Excuse me, there's people sitting right at the front…

Official: [excitedly] Yes! You can go and sit there too!!