Tuesday, 8 January 2013

Drunk Mimes

Still slacking from my London holiday.

Here's a story for ya:

I was happily sitting on the tube when a couple of drunk mimes got on. 

I didn't realise they were drunk, to begin with.

Although their heavily smudged face-paint and cans of beer were probably an early indication. 

[this plus alcohol.]

One of them broadcast his slurred plea to the carriage;

Drunk Mime 1: How to do we get to Euston?

This is the tube - no one talks.

Especially to strangers. 

So he was ignored. 

But I felt a bit bad seeing as they were not on the right train…

Me: You need to go the other way.

Drunk Mime 2: Oh. [to his friend] We're goin' the wrong way. 

Unfortunately, Drunk Mime 1 was already bored and playing with his phone. 

So they did nothing. 

We reached the next station. 

American Lady: [to me] They need to get off here. [to them] You need to get off here.

They looked around blankly. 

Drunk Mime 2: o.0

Me: This station - go over there [points to train in other direction] then change at Kings Cross.

They dither. 

Drunk Mime 2 gives a few shoves to his friend.

Who continues to ignore him. 

American Lady: It's now or never..!

In a sudden blur of motion, they rush towards the closing door. 

Then a loud, collective **GASP** from the whole tube carriage tells me something is wrong…

Because remember: tube-people don't speak. 

I looked over.


Mime stuck in the door!!


Only one of them managed to get off and trying to bring his friend with him, got his ARM trapped in the door. 

Everyone stares, frozen, open mouthed. 


Then the door opened! - mime pulls out hand - then it closes. 

Tube separation of drunk mimes?? 

: /

Door opens again - other mime jumps out! - then it closes. 

The muffled shouting of the jubilant and injured mimes travels through the walls of the train. 

And everyone falls about laughing. 

American Lady: I tried to help them earlier but they just made fun of me for being American… :S